The following is a list of excuses compiled from insurance
companies all over the world.
1) Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I
2) The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its
3) I thought my window was down but found that it was up when I put my
hand through it.
4) I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
5) A truck backed through my windshield and into my wife's face.
6) A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
7) The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times
before I hit him.
8) I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law,
and headed over the embankment.
9) In my attempt to kill a fly I drove into a telephone pole.
10) I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel
and had an accident.
11) I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my U-joint
gave way causing me to have an accident.
12) To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the
13) My car was legally parked as it backed into another vehicle.
14) An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
15) I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of
the road when I struck him.
16) The pedestrian had no idea which way to run, so I ran over him.
17) I saw a slow-moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the
hood of my car.
18) The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car
with a big mouth.
19) I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a
ditch by some stray cows.
20) The telephone pole was approaching, I was attempting to swerve out
of its way, when it struck my front end.